This commission is ruining all the fun drawing is to me. I feel sick just looking at the photos and knowing I have to finish the job. Already told the client I can't do it, but he insisted that I finish at least half the job. Believe me, I have tried. It's just not working and what's worse: I already accepted a lot of other commissions and I can't finish those either, because this unwanted job is killing me.

I need money. But I don't earn money getting stuck in an artblock. That's why I haven't touched any pens or paper in nearly two weeks - except for trying to paint a swimming pool. Swimming pool. A pool! Why the hell did I accpet that job?! The client doesn't know a thing about painting! When I told him, that I don't have.. 3d models or clipart to work with, he was: "Oh. You paint all that? I thought.. you know.. you just collage things together..?" No. Me no collage things.

To fight frustration, I began to read again. Then I played Guild Wars until my fingers cramped. Thanks goes to my guild-friends for helping me out that much. Finally I did housework. I threw away a couple of dozens videotapes as I no longer have a VCR and I can use some extra space in my room. Then I went out a bit.

Finally, my artjuices are flowing again. Scribbled a few things and I like them. Still - doesn't solve my swimming pool problem. Will try my hands again on that.. f***** swimming pool tomorrow.

My apologies to all that ordered a commission from me. My reasons are.. petty, I know. But reasons or no reasons - if I end up not being able to draw, then I suppose I have to live with it as much as you have to ._.

Oh by the way - I got addicted to House MD. while I was suffering from pool-artblock. I love that series, especially the dialogues.